Tuesday, October 27, 2009

My Soap Box

Here I am on my soap box again. I like to think that from way up here I can see the world in absolute clarity. See all the wrongs and the failures and all the things that need fixing. I like this box. To stand here and preach at the passerby. To tell others of their rights and wrongs.

But the truth is up here I can't see squat. I only blind myself in thinking I am better than others. So here I come, climbing down. Down to a world that is flawed and filled with wrongs. Down here, where I don't think I'm so much better, it is so easier to see. And much easier to get stuff done.

But here is one thing I see no matter where I stand.

"You have your problems and I have mine. You deal with your own shit and I'm gonna deal with mine." This is the way of the world. This is the way of our lives.

Why?

Since when did we, as americans, become this way?
Since when did we, as christians, become this way?
Since when did we, as friends and family, become this way?
Since when did we, you and I, become this way?

We seem to think that it is simply polite to keep our problems to ourselves. I mean they are own problems and we wouldn't want to burden others with them. But why? Since when is that ok? A Swedish proverb say this:

"Shared joy is double joy; shared sorrow is half a sorrow."

Why can't we learn that when we hurt there are those around us who want to help? What good is it to close yourself off from the world around you and suffer alone? It hurts worse than anything. Not only to have to suffer our pains alone but to have to keep them from people.

And even in the bible it says this:

"Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ." Galatians 6:2

So let's recap. Not only by letting other people help us in times of pain will we not have to suffer as much, we also fulfill the law of Christ. By helping others and letting others help us with obey our Saviour and our Creator! Sounds like a good motivation to me.

We have become a society where it is "cool" or "normal" to deal with our own problems. How often do you hear "this is my problem and I'm gonna take care of it!" in a movie or TV show? This is who we've become. And I wanna know why!

I ask for two reasons: One is because I am human. I have my ups and my downs. And during my downs I want to have someone there who can help me weather the storm and by doing so lead me to another up. But I am frightened that people will think I'm too much to handle. I'm afraid that if I open up and reveal my problems people will look down on me, because that is the nation we're in. We see movie stars and models and so many people who the media tells us are perfect. So anyone with problems in less than perfect and therefore not worthy. That is such bullshit. Everyone is flawed. Especially me. Which is why I need the support if others to help me get through hard times. But I'm afraid because of what we have become.

And the other reason is because I like to be there for people. There was a time not to long ago I had this friend who had some major problems. They continued to rely on me for support and it got to be so much I thought I couldn't handle it anymore. I was near the point of telling this friend to deal with their own pain and leave me out of it when I stopped and thought about why I would do that. Why would I stop helping them? Why? So I prayed and thought about and came to the realization that it wasn't because they were being too much but because I simply didn't want to deal with it. But the truth is there should never be a "too much" for those we care about. There should never be a marker that if this person is just too messed up I'm not gonna deal with it anymore. No! We should always be there for each other. To take each other's hand and help each other through the storms and the valleys. That way we can enjoy the sunshine and the mountain tops together! After this realization I have always tried to be there for people. And I enjoy being there for people. Even though I fail sometimes beacuse I am human, I always try.

Remember, we all stumble, every one of us. That's why it's a comfort to go hand in hand. ~Emily Kimbrough

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